Notes from new parents
Guest contribution by Lalitha
We had our first baby joining us last year this month. We as a couple, were not very fond of schedules and routines. But our life changed drastically once this little human became a part of our family. We now crave for routines and make sure to stick to these as much as possible. What has these routines and schedules done to us, as a couple? I often sit and reflect back on the day or week and then realize that there is so much order in our life now. The order is very soothing and addictive to say the least. For someone like me, who was spontaneous enough to decide things at random hours this is a false reality. Nevertheless, life happens, and we change. This change is something I never saw coming. May be because, I never knew the reality of having a tiny little human with me all the time.
Working as Team
We now, work as a team and share the baby chores and household chores amidst running errands and maintaining a social life. The work consumes most of our days, though we were very lucky to have had 6 months of parental leave. Some of the weekends are merely for deep cleaning, sorting, arranging, and planning the week ahead. We juggle between chores, and it is exhausting at various levels, for being parents is not an easy thing! When it is all overwhelming, we immediately take a break, pause everything, and just do the basics. Even better, sometimes we make quick plans and step out and enjoy the family time together in parks, restaurants or just stroll around the city. We do make sure to do all of these, taking into consideration the nap times and mealtimes of the baby. When we used to see couples with small babies, before having ours, we never realized that there was so much going into planning for them to even stroll around with the baby.
Day out of schedule
A day out of schedule feels so messed up. The routine is broken and then it takes a while to put back the routine. The efforts and struggles are real. However, this has definitely helped me, and my husband become good at time and resource management, an important life skill. We now manage our time so optimally that we almost make time for everything. I just don’t know how! May be that’s what proper planning and scheduling helps us do. Me and my husband were having a casual conversation over a cup of coffee one evening. He told me, he felt guilty for not having used his time this well all these years. He felt there was a lot of time that he could have used in various ways. I am glad, we could at least realize this now and make the most of the precious resource – time.
Sleep Eat and Me time
Sleep is given the most significant priority these days and so is eating good balanced meals. We give each other some “me” time too. Sometimes the to-do list keeps going on and on. We make sure to do only what we can for that day/week and often times put ourselves first. A lot of responsibility has suddenly creeped in, to take care of self, simply because we can pour into someone’s cup only if our cup is full. This new journey has paved way in the last year to help us become unusually better in many ways. Of everything, I thought baby would do to us, this is something I never anticipated.
I am very happy and proud of us for doing it all alone from pregnancy to delivery to this one year of parenting. We are definitely looking forward to many more learnings our way through this amazing journey of parenthood.